Ellie belfiglio

When I hear this sound that awakens me, intimidating its way into my cloistered night, I write…

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Guilt closed your door!

Confusion is your core!

Breathe the breath of your own!

So wrapped, creating the clone.

Live the life that you’ve so created.

Continuing, exasperation will be fated.

Perfection exist in one’s mind.

Conditions puts on loves, keep you blind…


my doubts are gone.


I’m bored with it.

I yawn!! …







My hearts faintly beating , slowly beating;

And the greeting!

Of each new day is but a task that I at dawn-

take up anew;

And I wonder onward lonely, growing weary,

and more lonely.

Since fate must ever lead, mean the road-

away from you.

The road wind on before me, it would lure me;

And would tempt me.

But my heart shall never listen and-

calls to me in vain;

For your love is ever with me, ever comforting,

ever guiding.

And the memories of your sweetness are –

my roses in the rain.




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Overcome by the rising tide: Hate;

And sucked under by undertow: Fear;

I caress the animal within me who bares-

my name on its tongue and devours me-

from the inside out..

But I know the beast that dwells-

in the halls of my soul is me!

So I find some comfort, no strangers…

Somebody save me!

A heroic deliverance from the blackened self,

So the wayfarer my nest his feet.

He’ll need them to run…

For somewhere in my darkest inner-sanctity-

waits a monster.

My name shaved into his hairy back.

He likes it here and wants to stay.

My soul begins to fly;

Like the dove from the ark, like the thunder from sky!

And soars away, far from here;

On the wings of angels, from hate and fate!! …







Oh, the night is dark with its long and empty roads.

And this life of mine is stranded in its colds.

And swaying in wind whose “raving voice” is unkind;

Like the thoughts of your goodbye that are howling in my mind.

The moon barely glows behind the clouds in the skies.

Her light is shining dim blue and pale.

My dreams barely glow behind the tears in my eyes.

A blur in this world without you they fail.

And oh, how many times didn’t I call your sweet name.

Don’t despair you said, it’s all a silly game.

The trees whining along with the wind;

An end to their battle that is their plea.

My heart is pleading for the day to begin;

In a new world when it can be free!! …






When tears well up behind one’s eyes,

And wrenching sobs turn into fright!

When longing hits to overtake,

One’s spirit, and then to rake.

The very soul that lives within;

There comes the thought of what has been.

The love that was, that is, that will,

Stay with one now, till all is still.

And then on high, one’s soul will ride,

Upon a cloud in heaven’s tide.

One doubts there is a sweeter thought,

Than joining thus which God hath wrought!! …



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My love, I have come to see you… It is really true, your love for

me and my love for you.

Oh, if I could only describe it in more words.

Oh, yes… now I can see, as I am with you, the waves are gently

caressing me… Oh so softly and gently as you show your love for me.

As your gentle softness moves about me, another wave a little more

bold, but yet so loving wrapping itself around me. But then…

another breaks with greater force… but still with so much love!

And then… without any warning a violent wave breaks and

wraps me up completely and takes me with it to the highest

possible peak of total oneness and such complete love and then…

I knew at once… the wave… the sea… and I are…

— One— no doubt—

And then a complete feeling of total calm… as still as nothing…

Nothing moving except for the gentle slight rocking of our bodies

as we reveal our love for each other “as one.”

No words, no sounds… only God above and the sea and you;

and I knew of “great love affair with the sea”… as you show your love for me!!!

You, my precious love, are the “great, vast and mighty sea.”!!! …





“For my mom, specially now that she is fighting to be alive”


How could I have waited so long?

It wasn’t that I travelled the wrong path… just the long path home.

You knew not of me, nor I of you,

Yet in my heart I felt there was two.

… (Though an image of only one.)

From another time and another place,

By different lands our lives were shaped.

External forces and unforeseen influences,

Should have resulted in many a difference.

… (But we seem so much alike!)

I wonder of what could have been, would have been,

Had our lives turned on the axis from what is now to what was then;

Or, if the helical spiral had twisted awry in the middle,

There may indeed have been a different ending.

… (I might never have left you!)

For decades of longing for a lost mother,

And with all the memories, then how could I miss her?

Separate roads travelled and obstacles overcome,

Toward a hidden treasure… taken for granted some!

… (But not I, for you are my special mother!)!! …




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If my hands could know the warp and weft… of all there is to touch;

If my voice knew all the ranges… of verse and song and such;

If my eyes could see all the beauty… without a moron’s stare;

If I only knew the words to write… exactly what was there;

If my mind could fully comprehend… all there is to learn;

Then I would take a smiling step… toward the waiting urn!! …




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If you touch me,

I might die.

Deny me___ Take my life.

I can already feel my breath runs away.

Hands are two inches from my personal space;

Close enough to echo;

Close enough to make me worry!

Heat against the hairs on my skin.

Electricity again;

And more about to begin…

If you touch me,

I might die.

Kill me! Save my life!! …