Ellie belfiglio

When I hear this sound that awakens me, intimidating its way into my cloistered night, I write…



I wrote this poem right after we left our smuggler in Karachi , Pakistan. He took us from Iran to Pakistan by ways of traveling through Shara. He was an honorable man. He was my defender through many days of the excruciating travel through the SHARA after the Iranian Revolution of 1979. He practically saved my children and my life. In this poem I am saying FAREWELL to him. I never heard from him up to today. Yes, we can find honorable person even in the smugglers. Halim, where ever you are, this for you…


Is it wrong to wish, pray, cry for a spell?

The time has arrived, back to cell.

I cover my entity into a shell.

The enemy I live with is a rebel.

He seizes the power to compel.

The shameless foe kills to excel.

A chill blast of air cause me to yell.

The howl of wind is heard well.

The feebleness results to dispel.

Everything is gone, nothing to sell.

Leaving the defender is like a hell.

The separation rings in my ears like a bell.

I’ve never learned how to quell.
Farewell friend, farewell…


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Living is a mystery, I know.

I learned it as a child, long time ago.

I watch the sky after rain, look for rainbow.

Shivering of cold, I gaze at snow.

The steamy windows cause the woe.

I fall and rise, want to know.

I was a tiny girl, wearing on my hair a bow.

Late for everything, ready to go.

The happy bird up there knows to flow.

It is not a mockingbird, but a crow.

Ambiance is calm, things are slow.

Today I haven’t seen sun to glow.

Affliction is high, temperature low.

The causes are from down below.

The storms come, go, people they throw.

Living is shaped of a narrow row.

Mystery is the end, I am pro.

We all are actors of this show.

Creatures of the earth feel the blow.

Life is both woe and bliss, I said so…



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Now you see-
Why today to my dismay
I can’t remember which is more,
Two plus two or three plus four…

Ellie belfiglio

With a little twist and turn ( actually a lot), I am writing about this conversation that truly happened when I was in Elementary School (I don’t remember what grade) between my teacher and myself. It was decades ago so I had to use my imagination to bring it back to life. The part (IT DEPENDS) is as it was. I tried to have a little fun with it. Here it is…


Never understood

Why my teacher would

Laughed when I said, “It depends,”

To her question: “What is more?

Two plus two or three plus four?”

Anytime she asked,

My friends laughed out loud!

My answer was always, “It depends”!

She would angrily insist: “Depends on what?”

My answer: “Two apples and two dirty socks

Is less than three candies plus four shiny rocks.

But three frowns plus two tears

Is less than two smiles plus two parents.


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I stroll quietly on the shore;

Where waves rush to the bank and roar.

The obscure clouds take control.

While waves are defeated their role.

The thunder follows a bright light.

Confused seabirds lose their sight.

The houseboat, close by, moves away.

I hear on it victims pray.

Rain starts with full force,

Nature shakes within its course.

A vain hope rises to subdue.

Cry begins between me and you.

Ambiance is harsh and tense.

Rushing waves are tall and immense.

Nothing there looks divine.

Nasty lightening is the only shine.


Suddenly the storm stops the blow.

A crevice opens in sky for a show.

Sudden lights in the middle glow.

It’s not the lightening, but a rainbow…




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“SLAVE” ~~~~ OLD

Feelings are wild animals who sway.

Take control of people who stray.

Stop the motion one needs and slay.

Quiver, shake, and play…


Happiness brings excitement for ambitious.

Fear and commotion make some viscous.

Betrayal changes us to suspicious.

Loneliness results a capricious…


Is there a feeling we can share?

Doesn’t burn your inside with flair?

 Where is the wisdom, the way to compare?

Who is the playful evil behind the air?


Tears of the prisoner of feeling ooze-

Down the wrinkled face of one who knows abuse.

The arrogant pretends happiness on the cruise.

The ignorance of those makes me amuse.


You and I are slave of feeling in cold.

The wild animal inside us is real bold,

The weakness of us is ancient and old.

To live today, put feelings on hold…






… So I lied…

I said I was happy, prosperous.

I said my melancholy was long gone.

… So I lied…

I feel a mad affliction in this cruel world-

Which causes me dis-consolation.

I feel a forceful blow in my soul-

Which cause me languish.

… So I lied…

Maybe I felt bliss when I said it!

Maybe I felt rapture when I groaned it!

Maybe I wasn’t sorry when I sensed it!

… So I lied…

I don’t know what I feel.

When I feel happy, I am truly sad.

When I am sad, I am truly desperate.

Am I complex?

I even don’t know it myself.

… So I lied…

I torture myself for the lies;

Don’t you torture me now!

I am with many excruciating sorrows.

Don’t you criticize me.

I criticized myself all the time.


… So I lied…

I lied because I wanted things to be different.

Bear with me, help me.

Tolerate me until I find myself;

This lost soul!

See! I am laughing.

But I just lied about laughing.

Can’t you see I am crying?

…SO I LIED!! …